Two days ago, I made a new best friend. Her name is Pat the Countrywide Mortgage Customer Service Lady, and she became my best friend by telling me that she would override the late charge on my account that occured not because I'm a totally unorganized slacker that didn't pay her bill on time (which, by the way, is true, but not the reason for the tardy payment THIS month), but because the stupid people that are buying my stupid house are being stupid and didn't have all their stupid paperwork at the stupid closing, so the stupid lendor pushed back the date. But, on the sunny side of the street, I met my new best friend Pat the Countrywide Mortgage Customer Service Lady. Today, however, I have a new best friend and her name is Otter. She became my best friend for her post today that sent me into a fit of giggles when I read #8, which implanted a visual that sent me into such a state that I'm pretty sure I peed my pants just a little.