I hate junebugs. No really, I hate them.

Normally I'm a live and let live kind of gal...except mosquitos. I hate them too. And flies, but only when they're in my house. Oh, and also ants. Okay, maybe I'm not such a live and let live, but that's not my point. My point is, I hate junebugs. They give me the heebie-jeebies like you wouldn't believe. I'm not sure if it's the noise they make bouncing off my windows, or if it's the fact that they divebomb me at 45 mph, or if it's just because they look like they just climbed out of some pre-historic swamp and want to bite me. They're icky. I tell you this only because I was attacked last night by a swarm of junebugs. Do junebugs swarm? I'm pretty sure junebugs swarm. Anyway, we got a new storm door, and as it turns out it's apparently big and scary when you're a dog. So I've been trying for two days to convince my dog that the door is, in fact, a door, and not some horrid monster attached to the house, waiting to pounce and suck her heart out. So, yeah, that's going really great, and I spent 30 minutes holding the door open last night speaking in my stupid dog voice, when the junebugs attacked. The first one landed in my hair...which, frankly, is enough to send me into seizures, and then all his brothers joined in. One hit my neck, one on my upper back, one on my left cheek. So, I did what any rational person would do, ran across the back yard screaming and flailing my arms. Then I picked up the dog (I give up, really I do...she won't use the door on her own) and went inside. About 20 minutes later, I was laying on the bed flipping through the channels when I felt something crawling inside my shirt. Yep, you guessed it. JUNEBUG! I swear I almost had to go to the hospital.

In my research this morning I discovered that "When toasted in hot ashes, the internal body parts and juices of the bug congeal into a nugget of pure golden nutrition. After peeling off shriveled legs, wings, and wing case, the remaining orb of nourishment can be eaten one at a time or by the handful.
Toasted June bugs have a surprisingly sweet delightful taste. The flavor closely resembles thick raw molasses or crudely made ribbon cane syrup. It is difficult to eat just one.
Crushed into fine powder, bug-flour added to hot water forms a rich nourishing drink perfectly suited to victims suffering from anemia, dehydration, and other maladies. If mixed with warm milk, it has a malted milk taste.
However, toasted June bugs should be consumed in measured proportions because of the heavy concentration of protein and fat. If eaten in large amounts, the rich oily meal can result in stomach ache or mild diarrhea." from this really disturbing website. I find it interesting that they claim that it's difficult to eat just one. Mmmmm...Junebug flavored Lay's Potato Chips....